Q & A Session

Over the past several months, we have had many questions from family and friends regarding our adoption. So we thought we would take this time to answer some of the most asked questions about our adoption.

-Why did you choose to adopt?
After not being able to conceive naturally over the last several years we had several options to chose from. We chose adoption as it is something I have always wanted to do and we feel like this is where we were being lead. I read a great article that really hit home as well. It stated that you need to decide which is more important: being pregnant or being a parent. So after many months of prayer and consideration, here we are!

-Why would you want to meet the BM?
We want to meet the BM of our child to learn more about where our child came from. The BM chose to place her child for adoption which says that she truly cares about the child. There are other options that she could have chosen and adoption is such a selfless act that we respect her decision greatly. We want to know as much about the BM so that we can eventually tell our child all about where he/she came from. We also want the BM to get to know us so that she feels comfortable with her decision for us to parent the child.

-Will you get to name the baby?
Yes, we will get to name the baby. Once the BM signs consent over to us, we will have a new birth certificate made with the name we choose for the child.

-Is the adoption a "done deal?"
No, the adoption is not done deal. Once the BM delivers the baby, she may not sign a valid consent until 48 hours after the birth of the child or the day that she is discharged from the hospital. The BF may sign the consent any time after the birth of the child. Once the consent is signed it is binding and irrevocable from the moment it is signed unless it can be proven in court that the consent was obtained by fraud or duress. Then it will take another 6 months for the finalization to take place. Each state has different laws on when the consent may be signed. We are following Florida state laws as that will be the birth place of our child.

-What happens if the BM decides to parent the child?
We will stay with the same attorney we are working with in Florida and be matched with another BM. Financially, we will only be out the money that was spent for the BM's living and medical expenses already incurred.

-Are you nervous that the BM might change her mind?
Yes and no. Obviously this would be a devastating loss for us if she does decide to parent the child, but Glen and I both feel that if this child is meant to be our child, it will be our child. We have followed God's path up to this point so we will not stray now.

-When will the baby be able to go home with you?
Once the consent is signed, we will have custody of the child but will need to remain in the state of Florida until all paperwork is filed with the court. This process could take 3-5 days after we have custody of the child. After the paperwork is filed, we are free to leave Florida and head home with our baby!

Hopefully this Q & A session has helped answer some question that you may have been wondering about. If you have any further questions, feel free to post a comment and I will be happy to answer.

Booking our trip to Orlando

Over the last week we have been in contact with our Case Worker who is the mediator between us and our BM. The case worker takes the BM to all of her doctors appointments and assists her with anything that she might need. We have confirmed our trip to meet our BM on January 11-12th. We will fly into Orlando, have dinner with the BM (birthmother), BF (birthfather) and the case worker. This dinner will allow us to get to know our BM and BF and for them to learn all about us. We are really looking forward to meeting them! Our case worker stated they are excited to meet us as well. Then, if all goes as planned we are to go with our BM to have a 3D ultrasound the next morning. This was a surprise to us! Our case worker mentioned it and said that our BM is okay with allowing us to go with her. So, hopefully if they are able to get this ultrasound scheduled while we are in town, we will find out the sex of the baby and see what he or she looks like! After the ultrasound we will have lunch together and then head back to Kansas City. It will be a packed two day trip but we are super excited for January to get here.

Only one more day before our Thanksgiving celebration! Glen is picking up my sister, nieces and David at the airport tomorrow afternoon. Then Glen's mom, sister, brother-in-law and nephew will get into town tomorrow night. We are expecting 18 family members at our house on Thanksgiving Day! We have so much to be thankful for and really owe it all to God. He has walked with us every step of the way and we thank Him for the path He has led us on.

Boy or Girl?

As I mentioned in my last post, we were hoping to find out the gender of the baby over the past few weeks. Well, we are still waiting to get the news! The birthmother went in for her ultrasound and the baby wouldn't cooperate for them to see if it is a boy or a girl. So, as we seem to be so good at waiting, we will wait some more!

We spoke with the attorney in Florida this past week. Everything is going smooth with the birthmother as planned. When she went in for her last check-up she was measuring 3 1/2 weeks bigger than the week she was in. Sounds to me like either a big baby or the baby might come sooner than planned. After discussing things with the attorney, Glen and I have decided we will meet the birthmother sometime in early January. We have been looking into flights to the Orlando area as the birthmother lives outside of Orlando. This meeting will take place with a representative from the attorney's office. Any time we meet with the BM or send her cards, etc. it will be mediated by an individual from the law office. This ensures everyone that everything is done legally. We are learning alot about laws these days!

Glen and I also spoke with a BM from our adoption agency this week. It is a service that our agency provides to prepare us for when we meet our BM. The BM we spoke with works for our agency and placed her child for adoption 19 years ago. She gave us great insight on what type of questions the BM might ask us and what questions are acceptable to ask her. She was very great to work with and told us to remember that this is just as emotional for us as it is for the BM.

I can't believe Thanksgiving is just around the corner! Glen & I are preparing to host it at our house again this year. This is Glen's favorite holiday and he can't wait for the day to be here. We plan to have about 20 family members over to share in this wonderful holiday. Glen's family will stay with us for a few days while they are in town and my sister and niece's will be staying with my mom. We are super excited to spend this time with our family.

March 14, 2011

We have officially been matched with a birthmohter and her due date is March 14, 2011!!!!! Glen and I are both so excited and can't wait for the arrival of the baby. We were matched with a birthmother from Florida last Sunday, October
17th. We hope to find out the gender of the baby in the next week or two.

We can't explain the emotions that we have gone through in the last week. God is shining down on us and we are so thankful for His love. From the start of this journey, we have followed where He has lead us and we are so grateful to be where we are today.

We ask that our friends & family pray for the birthmother: that she delivers a healthy baby and prayers for her to be at peace with her decision in her adoption plan.

Thank you all for your support and prayers on this journey we have begun!

Positive Adoption Language

As you have probably figured out by now, neither of the 2 BM's that we submitted our profile book to worked out. One of the BM's chose another family within our same referral service but located in South Carolina. The other BM has not made an adoption plan as of now. When we heard the news that we were not chosen it was very upsetting. Glen said it perfect, it felt like seeing a negative on a pregnancy test. Even though there are so many possibilities out there, just sending the book to a BM is emotional. Thinking that this could be the one. I hope to not get tied up and emotional about each situation but in reality, it is difficult not too. So, hopefully this week will bring more BM's and more possibilities for us.

Glen and I attended an educational workshop provided by our agency that performed our homestudy. We learned a lot of information and wanted to share some of it with you. One of the more interesting things we would like to share is the positive adoption language. The following positive adoption language is used instead of the negative language that helps perpetuate the myth that adoption is second best. By using positive adoption language, we educate others about adoption.

Positive Language:
Placed baby for adoption
Made an adoption plan
Chose adoption
Parenting/deciding to parent
Birth parent
Could not conceive

Negative Language:
Gave up a baby
Gave away a baby
Put up for adoption
Keeping the baby
"Real" parent
Couldn't have their "own" child

I know I have used the negative language in the past. Now that I am educating myself on the subject of adoption I cringe thinking about who I may have offended. The BM's love their children enough to give them life. That is the greatest gift of all and I respect the BM's who chose life over the alternative.

Two Years Ago

I can't believe it has been 2 years since we said goodbye to our sweet angel, Annabelle. It seems like it was just yesterday but at the same time, looking back over the two years it seems like it has been an eternity. Today started off with a call from my mom wishing me a good day and prayers to be strong throughout the day. All in all, I actually had a good day. Tiffany and Rylee visited and brought a beautiful flower arrangement for my office. I also received an email from a prospect customer that I have been calling on for more than 6 years that finally told me I got their business! A Step Ahead Adoption Service called to give us a new potential birthmom update too! Then I left work and headed to the cemetery to spend some time in prayer. It felt great to be there and feel the sense of peace that I get when I am there. It is such a beautiful cemetery and in the next month the changing trees will make it even more breath taking. I arrived home to a pink balloon and bow on our tree that I bought Glen for Father's Day last year. Even better, I walked in to two cases of wine that my stepdad had brought back from St.Louis and a dozen pink roses my mom had placed on our kitchen table! I am so grateful for my family and friends that have supported us through this journey we have been on. I can't imagine getting through the bad days without someone there to lean on for support.

Glen and I were talking last night about what we have been through the past two years. We don't go a day without thinking about Annabelle and wishing that she was here with us. We see many two year olds and wonder what Annabelle would be like at two. Along with the loss of our daughter, we have struggled with infertility since then. We never would have imagined we would be where we are right now. God has a funny way of showing you that He is in charge and has other plans for us. We may not know why things happen but I am sure in the future we will look back on this time and see why God has chosen this path for us. We have definitely let go and let God.

Update on the adoption front: we sent our profile book off to two birthmothers this week! One BM is in Kansas and due January 25th with a baby boy, and the other BM is due late October in Oklahoma with a baby boy as well! We welcome all prayers that one of them might choose us.

Glen's mom is coming in town this weekend to visit. We plan to spend time with family, take her to our neighborhood block party and do a lot of good eating!

Adoption Profile

Click here to view this photo book larger

Officially Official

We are officially official as of September 9, 2010! Our homestudy is finalized, our profile book is finished and now we begin the journey. It feels so great to have everything complete. It has been a fun and exciting process but we are glad we are one step closer. From here, we just wait. Our consultant, Shannon, will start sending profiles of birthmothers to us to view. If we are interested in any, we let her know and then send them our profile book. From there, the birthmother views many profiles and decides what family best fits what she is looking for in a family to raise her child. So, as they say, it could be 2 weeks or a year before we bring our baby home.

Mom & I are heading to Babies R Us today to pick out some essentials that we don't already have. The big items we need are a car seat/stroller combo, diapers, a diaper bag and a few more clothes. It is going to be so weird heading back into BRU as the past few times I have had to go in there for friends baby showers have really been tough. I had a breakdown at one visit and had to leave before I could even purchase my items. So, I am really looking forward to being able to shop, not have anxiety about being in there and pick out things for us!!!

On another note, today is a such a tough day for so many Americans throughout our country. Sept. 11 has so many different meanings to everyone. I pray for peace for all those families that lost a loved one 9 years ago. For me, today marks the day that we lost my dad 5 years ago. I can't believe it has been 5 years since he has been gone. I can still hear his voice as if it was just yesterday. I miss him terribly and think about him all of the time. I know he is probably hanging out with Annabelle and having a good time so I do have peace.

Another Step Closer

Glen and I attended the homestudy educational workshop this weekend at Adoption & Beyond. It was the last requirement needed for our homestudy to be complete! It was a great workshop with tons of information. We learned about what it is like being matched with a birthmother, positive adoption language and an overview of the actual match meeting with the birthmother. It was great to meet other couples going through the same stage of life as well. There were 6 couples that attended the workshop. The workshop answered many of the questions we still had about the adoption process. Glen and I have no doubt in our minds that we are where we are suppose to be right now!

Friday was our 5th wedding anniversary as well. With the workshop we had that night we made Saturday night our celebration night. We had dinner at Garrozo's which is one of our favorite places in town for dinner. We had a fantastic anniversary and look forward to a great future ahead of us.

We received our first call from our consultant at A Step Ahead Adoption Services this week! Our consultant, Shannon, lives in Overland Park, so I hope to meet with her sometime this week. She is going to help us get our profile book going. This book is what the birthmothers will look at when they are making their adoption plan. Shannon will also be sending us cases that we will review and decide if they are right for us to proceed with sending our profile to. She said her personal goal with all of her clients is to have a baby with them at home within 6 months. That is a great goal and we are super excited.

With all of this excitement starting, I decided to get our nursery ready again! We had kept all of the furniture in the room but put up most of the toys, blankets, etc. It is exciting getting all the fun stuff that I received from my baby showers back out in the room! I am probably jumping the gun a little soon but who cares! I plan to head to Babies R Us in a few weeks to look at some of the items we are still in need of. Ramsey thought some of the stuffed animals were hers so we will have a little lesson to teach her what is hers and what is not :-)

Glen is traveling to Iowa these days for work. He is working on a parking garage that will be done in a few months. He and a few others left for Iowa today. When I got home after he had left, I found the a/c not working. This is the 2nd time this summer it has gone out. I hope to get it fixed tomorrow. It is currently 82 in the house and Ramsey and I are not having too much fun!

Exciting news from my work is that our owner hired 2 gentlemen to run the company. Our owner is 71 and looking to retire. The 2 new guys will work out of our Minneapolis office. They come from a national recycler so they are bringing our company a lot of experience. They will be in town for the next two days so I look forward to meeting with them. They are changing our sales plan and hope to give us a commission on our sales. I look forward to making more money with the company! It couldn't have come at a better time!

Back to Reality

We are back from our 6 day vacation up North! We had a great time :-) We left last Friday morning and headed to Sioux Falls. We arrived at Shirley's house in the late afternoon and decided to have a BBQ that night for dinner. We had a great time catching up with the family. Glen's grandparents were able to come over for a while and visit too. Saturday Glen, David and I went to the Falls to walk around the park. Most of it was blocked off due to recent flooding in the area. We later headed out to the Sioux Empire Fair to have some good fried foods! We watched a hypnotist while we were there as well. Troy, Julie, John and David all left on Sunday. Glen and I went to dinner with Shirley and then headed over to the B & G Way, a local favorite ice cream shop! Monday morning Glen and I headed up to Minneapolis. Our first stop was to tour St. Paul's Cathedral. I have never seen such a beautiful church. It is close to 100 years old and the paintings and intricate detail on all of the walls was amazing. The next stop was the Mall of America. Boy is that a big mall! We walked around all 3 levels looking thru a lot of the stores. I was hoping they had different stores than we have at home but it seemed to be all the same stuff we already have here. After leaving the mall we went to dinner at a Diner's, Drive-in's and Dive's restaurant. We ordered a pizza and it was great! Tuesday morning we went to yet another DDD recommendation, Al's Breakfast, which was on the campus of University of Minnesota. I had the best waffle of my life! Glen was completely impressed that I actually finished the entire waffle. We then toured the Minneapolis Sculpture Garden. That is the place famous for the spoon and cherry sculpture. Then it was time for the Twins v. White Sox game. This was the highlight of our trip for Glen! We toured the new stadium before the game started. Luckily, the Twins winded up winning the game in the 10th inning! Glen was a happy camper. That ended our trip on a good note. We headed back home on Wednesday. We had a great trip and was happy to see family as well.

While we were on vacation we received a phone call from our adoption agency to set up a time for them to do our in-home meeting. So, we actually did that yesterday. I woke up yesterday with a lot of anxiety and anticipation as to what to expect for the meeting. As soon as the social worker arrived and we introduced ourselves, I began to feel completely at ease. She was super nice and knew what we were going through because she is the mother of 2 adopted children! She interviewed Glen and I together and then separate, we took a tour of our home and then it was over. It was so much nicer than I had ever expected. It is great to have that part done. We now have a workshop to attend on Friday night. Glen and I also decided tonight which referral service we are going to work through so we have sent the email off to get started on their paperwork. According to the service, they typically place a child in less than 1 year! We are looking forward to the next step of the adoption process with the hopes that we find our baby soon!

Vacation

What a crazy week this has been. Every night we have had something going on and it feels good now that it is all done. We turned in our homestudy workbook yesterday so we are one step closer to finding our child! The agency will call within a week to schedule our in-home meeting. Then we have a workshop to attend on August 27th, which is also our 5th anniversary. We thought that was a very appropriate way to celebrate our anniversary this year!

Glen and I are on vacation! We are headed to Sioux Falls for the weekend to visit Glen's family. We plan to spend time with Shirley, David, Julie, Troy and John. On Monday we are headed to Minneapolis. This will me my first trip that far north. We are hoping to go to a Twins baseball game on Tuesday if there are tickets available. The Twins built a new stadium this year so every game seems to be sold out. I am also looking forward to the Mall of America! I have been saving my "clothing fund" for a few months now so we should be able to have a little fun!

We will keep you updated as our adoption process moves forward. I am now collecting pictures so I can start our profile book. This is a scrap book of our life. Being the crafty person I am, this is the fun part :-)

The Journey Begins

Well, it has been way too long since the last time I wrote - I do apologize. We literally have been so busy I haven't had the time to sit down and write all the exciting things going on with us.

After much thought and prayer over the past few months, Glen and I finally decided to pursue adoption! On July 15th we met with Adoption & Beyond to discuss our plan with them. Steffany Aye, the director at Adoption & Beyond, was very welcoming and gave us great information on where to begin our journey. We left that evening with a Homestudy workbook in hand. If you can guess, I had almost the entire book filled out by the end of the weekend! At this point we are done with all the paperwork, getting our physicals next week and then turning in the workbook on Thursday, August 12th. We are completely ready for this and super excited for this great journey of finding our child to begin. As many of you know, we sent out an email telling everyone of our decision to adopt. We were hoping to find a birthmother on our own but will also be using a referral service that searches the US to match us with a birthmother. This type of service usually finds a match within a year or less. We are keeping our fingers crossed and praying that our match comes sooner rather than later. We still have our in-home study to do, hopefully within the next month. This is when a social worker will visit our home to make sure it is kid friendly and safe. Then they will interview Glen and me separately and together. After that meeting we will be on the waiting list! I hope to keep everyone posted on this blog with all of our updates as we go through this journey. We have a lot of reading to do along with other usual life activities so I hope to make time to sit down and write. I have started a handwritten journal to document everything we do as well. I hope to one day give this journal to our son or daughter so they will know how we came to be there parents - it is titled "Our Journey to You." Just writing that title makes me feel so blessed that we are doing this and following what we feel God has lead us to do. We want to raise the child that is meant for us, however that child comes into our life.

We have also started our Marriage Prep classes with an engaged couple. Glen and I have enjoyed this tremendously. Discussing all of the topics with the couple has been great for us as well. I can tell this is something that we were meant to do and it feels great!

Over One Hurdle

I have been going to Dr. Mary for about 5 weeks now. I have some good news to report - I actually ovulated on my own this month!! As far as I am aware, this has not happened on it's own for over 3 years or longer! So, we are over one hurdle for this month. Glen and I are very excited that my body is responding naturally to the acupuncture treatments. I love going as it is very relaxing and a great time to just be quiet and still. Dr. Mary thinks that I shouldn't have a problem getting pregnant so I am going to go with what she is telling me :-) She said she is impatient and hopes that it happens this month. I, on the other hand, am being patient and will take it as it comes! I just love Dr. Mary and honestly feel the best I have in several years.

Yoga has been going well too. I am taking 2 classes a week at the Zen Zone in Lee's Summit. My Monday night instructor is very calming and makes the experience very relaxing. The Wednesday night instructor is very energetic and makes the room full of happiness with her sparkling personality. Two completely different experiencing each time. The part I look forward to every class is when we lay flat on our backs with eye patches over our eyes and blankets on us and the instructor goes to each person and gives them about a 30 second neck massage! I love massages even if they are only 30 seconds!!

My sister, Shelley, and my two nieces, Morgan & Mckenna, are coming in to visit this Friday and staying for a week. We are so excited to spend some time with them. They usually come visit every summer but were not able to make it last summer. We love hanging out on the boat and having a good time over at my mom's house. This year Glen and I are taking a few days of vacation while they are here. We will have 5 days off work over the 4th of July weekend. I can't remember the last time I had 5 days of vacation - maybe our honeymoon 5 years ago.

Glen and I have become a "certified" marriage prep lead couple at our church. When an engaged couple comes to the church to get married they are required to take a Marriage Prep Class. The engaged couple will come over to our house for 5 sessions. The sessions include such things as finances, intimacy, communication and religion. We are to discuss the different situations that they need to talk about before marriage. Every couple we know that has lead these classes say that they received as much out of it as the engaged couple. We are really looking forward to this experience. We have already been notified of our first couple.

Acupuncture

Over the past few weeks I have had several people mention doing acupuncture for infertility. I actually tried acupuncture last year before I started going to Dr. Starks. At that time I had no idea I had endometriosis so I don't believe the doctor knew how to treat me correctly - due to no fault of his own. Shortly after starting the acupuncture I started going to Dr. Starks. It was all becoming a little too expensive so I stop going to Dr. Sherman. It was so relaxing and I felt great afterwards but at the time I needed to choose between the two and the acupuncture didn't win.

Well, after several great success stories that I have heard recently we have decided that I should give acupuncture a try again. I was recommended by a friend to Dr. Mary Zhang at the Chinese Medicine Clinic. Last Thursday was my first appointment. Within 10 minutes of meeting with Mary she felt that I might have some sort of blood clotting/flow issue that is enabling me to get pregnant. So she wrote out a plan for me to follow with her. I will go to her 2x per week for 6 weeks and then 1x per week for the following 6 weeks. I am also taking a handful of herbs that she has recommended will help me with ovulation as well as my endometriosis and anything else that might be wrong! I have stopped all caffeine intake as well as no alcohol. My workouts have changed from bootcamp to yoga. And next week Dr. Mary will go over a nutritional plan with me. So, it is pretty much a complete turn around of my entire life. I figured things weren't working out the way I had been doing them so why not try the complete opposite! It has now been 5 days since my first appointment with Mary and I can already tell a difference in the way my body feels. I seem to be a lot more relaxed as well. If anything, I feel good! Over the past few months I have been so bloated from all the hormones and pills that my other doctor had been giving me. I just needed a changed of pace and wanted to feel normal again. We have decided to skip this month's IUI and wait another cycle or two before trying that again.

We are also still exploring adoption. We have been reading "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Adoption" that was recommended to us by a family who has adopted. Once we feel comfortable with the research we have been working on we plan to start meeting with a few agencies and hopefully setting up a profile with one or two. It is by no means an easy process so we want to make sure we know as much as we can before we jump in!

The Suspense is Over

The suspense is over......we didn't have success with the IUI this month. We were very upset to hear this news but life will go on! I actually went in today to have my baseline sonogram to see if we could start another round of the IUI. Unfortunately, my lining was too thick again and I had a few cysts. So, I am back on the meds to thin the lining for another 3 weeks. What an evil cycle it is - this thing called infertility! We will go back in around the first week of June to see if we are "approved" to try one more time.

In the meantime, Glen and I have been researching, praying and weighing our options on other methods of expanding our family. We attended a class on Natural Family Planning that our church offered a few weeks ago. It was a very informational class that we plan to start practicing after we give the IUI at least one more shot. It is a method of charting your cycle daily and then working with a practitioner to come up with a plan to try and "fix" the fertility problem rather than bypass it like the current program we are on. It is by no means a cure or a sure way of obtaining pregnancy but it is another alternative to in-vitro.

We are also starting the informational process of adoption. This has been an option that I have been interested in my entire life. We would like more than one child if God allows us, so we are going to start this process now. After going thru the many procedures, drugs and countless disappointing months of our infertility, we have decided maybe it is God's plan for us to have a baby another way. At this time we are actively researching adoption agencies and adoption attorney's and hopefully meeting with a few couples that have already gone thru this process. We are very interested in hearing how the process works from others who have chosen this route for expanding their family.

The Waiting Game

Our sonogram last Thursday went great! I had three large follicles on my right ovary!! We were good to go on our first round of IUI. So we were instructed to do the HCG trigger shot on Saturday night at midnight. That in itself terrified me because this was the shot that Glen had to administer! Glen had kept imitating how he was going to give the shot and it was more like "stabbing" than giving an injection. I joked about it to my nurse that I hoped I survived it! Saturday night came and as I mixed the liquid part with the powder to make the shot, I thought to myself 'If our neighbors see this thru the window, I am sure they will think I have a bad drug addiction!' Glen did a great job administering the shot and everything went fine. I actually didn't even know that he was already done. He now wants to go to Med School :-)

Monday we went in for the IUI procedure. It was very awkward as we never in a million years would have thought this is how we would have to go about trying to "make" a baby. The actual procedure was very simple and we were out of there in about 20-30 minutes. While visiting with Dr. Starks he reminded us that this procedure does increase our chances of having twins and the likelihood of having a boy if we do get pregnant. We were okay with both! At this point in our journey to parenthood we are open to a lot of possibilities. Dr. Starks as well as one of the nurses commented on how this has been a very successful month for the clinic. They have had 36 women get pregnant this month and most of them are having twins. This statistic if from doing IUI and IVF at the clinic. That was great news to hear! Dr. Stark wished us luck and said that he was kissing the lucky horseshoe above the door for us.

After this long journey we have been on, we know it is up to God as to when/how we will have a baby and we are leaving it in His hands. This has been a hard concept to grasp as Glen and I are both organized planners. We always thought we would get married, have a fun first year of marriage and then start our family. We wanted 3 kids and planned out when we would have them. After many years of trying to plan our lives we now know that God is in control and we will follow what He wants for us. All we can do is pray and know that there is a plan for us - we just have to be patient. (Patience had never been one of my strong points!)

I have an appointment for a pregnancy test on Monday, May 10th. In the meantime we will wait, pray and hope for good news to come!

Broken Promises

Glen and I had a great time in Nashville last weekend! But, we broke our promise to not have so much fun on Friday night that we waste our Saturday away. We arrived in Nashville on Friday afternoon just in time to hit a Krystals for lunch. Then we headed to Dave Ramsey's office so I could have my picture taken in front of his building. That was the highlight of the trip for me!! After checking into our hotel we headed downtown for a little bit of shopping. I found a cute top in one of the little boutiques. Then we went into The Wheel for our first drink of the day. They had a great singer, Megan, that was very entertaining. We had a few drinks there and then headed back to our hotel to get freshened up for the night. Our first stop of the night was at Roberts. We had some great hamburgers and listened to two good bands. They had a wonderful group playing bluegrass which was quite fun! By 7:00 the crowd was starting to get rowdy! So we headed over to Tootsie's. Upon entering Tootsie's at 7:00 there were already bar dancers and stage dancers! We knew we got there at a good time! We stayed at Tootsie's the rest of the night. It was so much fun! We met quite a few people and had a good time talking. By the end of the night, I was one of the stage dancers! I don't know why I do that but I hope to end my stage dancing days there. Saturday we slept in and didn't get out and about until late afternoon for lunch. We went to a great Italian restaurant called Demos for dinner. Printer's Alley was our next stop on the list. There are only a few choices for bars in the alley. One choice was "Nude Karaoke" or Lonnie's for Karaoke. We chose Lonnie's as we had been there before and had a great time. No, Glen nor I did any singing that night! Sunday we got up and headed to Pancake Pantry for breakfast. We had a fantastic time in Nashville but we were glad to be going back home to get some rest.





I went to my Dr. this week to have a sonogram to see how the pills they gave me a few weeks ago worked. Good news...my lining had gone down to a 3 and my ovaries looked good, so we are starting our first month for IUI. I received my medication on Friday and started our first round of injections Saturday night. I have a pen with a little needle that goes on it and I give the shot to myself every night for 5 days. I was a little nervous about doing it myself but after doing the first one it was so easy and I didn't even feel it. Thursday of this week I will go in again to have another sonogram to see how the follicles are maturing. We are over the first hurdle of this process so we are praying that this weeks sonogram goes just as well.

Live Life to the Fullest

I heard about a girl that went to my high school that passed away yesterday after battling several years with breast cancer. What an awful disease. She was married and had a 2-year old daughter that she left behind. When I hear these stories it really puts my life in perspective. Wow, I can't imagine the battle her and her family went through. May God bless her soul and be with her family during this time.

I have been so very blessed throughout my entire life and am so thankful to God for all that He has given me. Glen and I have a wonderful marriage, a happy & healthy family and that is all that we can ask for in this life. I made a promise to myself & Glen a while back to start living life to the fullest. We have seen first hand how things can change in a blink of an eye. We try to do everything and anything that is presented to us that we enjoy doing. That is why we are always so busy these days!

Speaking of living life to the fullest, we are headed to Nashville, TN tomorrow! We are so excited to be going back to one of our favorite towns!!! We are staying right in the middle of all the action. Friday night we will hit Tootsie's and Saturday we hope to visit the Blue Bird Cafe. Glen & I promised each other we wouldn't drink as much as we did on Friday night the last time we were there! We spent most of the day Saturday nursing our hangovers!! I will update with more details of our fun trip when we get back. I am also trying to figure out how to attach pictures to my posts. I think that will make them a little more exciting!

Technical Difficulties

Well, we were suppose to start our new fertility plan this month but we are currently having "technical difficulties!" It is almost becoming amusing. This past month I did not take any meds so I didn't think we would have any issues. After about 35 days of not starting my cycle and not having a positive pregnancy test, I called my Doc to find out what might be going on. They told me that the meds I had been on in the past sometimes linger in your system and therefore my body didn't know how to respond correctly. So, I went in last Tuesday to have a Progesterone shot to start my cycle. They said that it should start within 10 days and then we should be good to go to start the IUI this month. Saturday I finally started my cycle and was super excited to get going! I went to my Dr. yesterday to have an ultrasound and lab work done to make sure everything "looked" okay before starting the injections. Well, as soon as I started the ultrasound the nurse said, "Oh, this doesn't look too good." That is never a good way to start a conversation!!! (If you get grossed out by these terms -- I am sorry but it's the only way to explain it!!!) Come to find out the lining of my uterus was at a 9 and they like for it to be at a 5 to start on the injections. So, it was too thick to be able to start injections this month. She sent me into the next nurse who would tell me what to do from here. Karen gave me some more pills to take to thin out the lining. This round of pills is for 3 weeks. So, we are postponed another 3-4 weeks before we can go back and have another ultrasound. I am hoping and praying that these 3 weeks go by fast and that everything is perfect on the next ultrasound.

The upside of things is that I get to continue my workouts for another 3 weeks! I have been on a really good run of workouts this month and can notice a change in my body! Mom and I tried Yoga this week and it was kind of fun. It is completely different than the bootcamp I am currently doing but it is a good change of pace for once a week. I didn't seem to get that "workout" feeling after I left the class but I definitely felt more relaxed and stress-free afterwards. I think I will try to keep this class up once a week along with the bootcamp twice a week.

Glen and I have decided to take a little trip in a few weeks. We are going to go to Nashville for a long weekend. We took a trip to Nashville a few years ago and had a blast so we are hoping to have another great trip there. We love listening to live music, especially country, and love to have cocktails so this is the place for both!!! Plus I love all the people watching.

Current Life

I just created this blog so I am trying to get you updated to our current life in just a few days. We promise to have much more exciting and good news! Our fun news this past week is that we finally broke down and purchased a new king-size bed! If you know Glen and I we always have a goal in progress. A new bed has been our goal this past month. We went bed "testing" at the Mattress Firm a few weeks ago. As soon as we laid on one of the Tempur-pedic mattresses we knew immediately this was the bed for us. I felt like I was laying on a cloud. The salesman was great but was totally trying to get us to buy the bed that day. He said, "We have 0% financing for 6 months if you would like to go ahead and purchase it today, we can have it delivered tomorrow." Little did he know he was dealing with Dave Ramsey's #1fan!!! We told him we would be back in a couple weeks once we saved up some more $. A few weeks later we returned to the store and the same saleman was there. He said, "I remember you guys, weren't you the Dave Ramsey people?!" That is the kind of service I appreciate!! We bought the bed that day and had it delivered the following day, just like he told us!!!

We never realized how comfortable it could be to sleep on a bed! I understand what it is like to "sleep in" on the weekends now.

Our New Life

Life as we knew it would never be the same. Glen and I are both strong people and strong in our faith so I knew we would be okay! About 3 months after losing Annabelle, we decided to try and get pregnant again. I chose a new OB/GYN this time around. She perscribed me Clomid and sent us on our way. You always hear that after having a baby you are super fertile. We were hoping that luck was on our side. After 5 months of no luck with Clomid my doctor sent us to a Fertiliy Specialist, Dr. Starks. We met with Dr. Starks in May 2009. He told us our plan of action and we were set to go. This time he put me on Femara which is very similar to Clomid. We tried this for 3 months without acheiving pregnancy. We met with Dr. Starks again in February 2010 to change our plan. We are now starting injections and IUI this month! We will try this plan for 2-3 months and then regroup if it is not successful. We are very positive about the route we are on and know that one day we will have another child.

Annabelle Mae Stach

It was getting closer and closer to my due date and Glen and I were so excited! I already had two baby showers and received wonderful gifts from all my family and friends. We had the furniture delivered, the clothes washed and were just waiting on Baby Stach's arrival. Week 35 came and we had a very busy weekend. That Sunday night I felt a little tired and wanted to go to bed early. I took a bath and then laid in bed for awhile. Baby Stach was always very active in the evenings and that particular night I didn't feel any movement that I could remember. So, I laid on my back to see if I could get her to move. Nothing. Glen and I were starting to worry a bit so we called the hospital. They told us to come on in and they will hook up the monitors to make sure everything was okay. The nurse was trying to find the heartbeat but couldn't seem to find it - she kept blaming the machine. She called in another nurse and she didn't have any luck either. They called the doctor on call that night and she came in and did a sonogram to find no heart beat. When she told us this news it was like our life just went blank in front of us. I didn't know what to do, cry-scream-cuss? After that, the rest of the night was a complete nightmare, blurr to me. I remember them taking me down to the basement of the hospital to do one more ultrasound to make sure their findings where accurate. They assigned us to a room and gave me the inducing medicine. The nurse said, this could take hours or a couple of days so just be prepared. We then had the horrible duty of calling our parents to let them know what was going on. Glen, being the amazing husband he is, called my mother and told her the devastating news. My mom immediately came to the hospital to be with us during this difficult time. This was all around midnight. Needless to say, we didn't sleep that night. Morning came and as more people heard about the tragic news we kept getting more family/friends to be with us at the hospital. Our church was notified and Ann, our pastoral assistant and Father Tierney came to be with us and pray. The many visitors and prayers somehow got us thru what could have seemed like an eternity. I was given the epidural which made the pain of the contractions bearable. Sometime around 12:00pm is when I started having major contractions. The doctor came in the room and in about 15 minutes and 5-8 good pushes our precious baby was born. We had a baby girl, Annabelle Mae Stach. She was beautiful! The doctors immediately noitified us the cord was wrapped around her 2 times which could have been the cause of death. As difficult as it seems we held her like she was alive. Our family came in and everyone got to hold her. The hospital staff was so accomidating to whatever we felt comfortable with. One of Glen's managers called and notified us his wife worked for 'Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep' which is a non-profit photography organization that is able to capture pictures of the only chance we had to be with our precious daughter. We had over 300 pictures taken by Kathy Disney of our beautiful Annabelle with several of her family members. It was a moment I will never forget. We spent the rest of the day holding Annabelle. We had many visitors throughout the day which helped in ways more than words can express. Our nurse during this day was Angelee True and she truely was an angel sent to help us get thru this day. She was the most amazing person I have ever met and we hope to be able to meet her again in better circumstances. The following day we said our last goodbyes to our precious baby and left the hospital. Leaving that hospital was the worst moment I could have ever imagined. When we walked out of our room everyone just looked at us with teary eyes and whispered "I am so sorry." It felt so wrong leaving the hospital without our Annabelle. It was suppose to be the best time of our lives but instead it was the worst moment of our lives. The days following were all just a blurr to me. I was going thru the motions but not living life like I had before. Our amazing family & friends were a significant help thru this time with all the support, flowers, cards and prayers we received. Thank you all for everything that you did!

We learned from genetics test that Annabelle had Mosiac Trisomy 14. Most babies with this chromosomal abnormality wouldn't have made it thru the first trimester but somehow Annabelle was strong enough to make it to 35 weeks. We were so thankful to have her for the time that we did. She will always be in our hearts and missed deeply. We had her ashes placed in a mausoleum at a cemetary close to our house. We visit her quite often and always will.

Pregnancy

We found out I was pregnant February 23, 2008! It was the second best day of our married life!!! Pregnancy was quite an experience for me. The spring came around and I always get spring allergies and this year wasn't an exception. I couldn't take the normal meds I was use to taking so I just tuffed it out. This "allergy" season went on for like 3 months for me. Once that finally cleared up I kept having a bad back pain where I could hardly sit down. After going to the doctor about it he determined the baby was on my cyatic nerve which was causing the pressure and my back pain. It finally went away once the baby got a little bigger. Finally I was good to go! Glen and I decided we wanted to wait until the birth to find out what we were having. I never thought I could wait that long but I did. Most of the pregnancy went pretty smooth after those few episodes until 4th of July. We participated in the Lake Winnebago 5K walk and after the walk I was having major abdominal pains. It got so bad we finally went to the hospital. They viewed the baby to make sure everything was fine. They said that I had gotten dehydrated which was causing pre-term contractions. Boy, those were no fun.

Expanding the Family

After being married for a year, Glen and I decided it was time to try and expand our family. I went to my doctor to make sure we were good to go only to have my yearly pap test come back abnormal. This was a complete shock to us. So after visiting with my doctor he felt he needed to do a small surgery. Early November 2006 I went in for this surgery and found out from the results everything was fine. The doctor did tell us to wait at least 5-6 months before trying to get pregnant. May 2007 came and we were set to go - plus this was my 30th birthday month! After a few months of trying with no luck I went to a new OB/GYN to see if he had any "pointers" for us. He did some blood work, made me start charting my BBT and said to come back in a few months. A few months later, he reviewed my charts and came to the conclusion that I was not ovulating. He then prescribed me the fertility med Clomid. I took Clomid for 3 months with no luck. Then he sent me in to have an HSG test to make sure my tubes were not blocked. The HSG test came back fine, nothing was wrong with my tubes. So, he was about to send me on to a Reproductive Endocrinologist when suddenly we found out I was pregnant that month after having the HSG test and not taking any fertility meds!!! We were so surprised and couldn't have been happier. Our dreams of having a family were finally coming true.

We also expanded our family with the addition of Ramsey, our crazy dog! Ramsey came into our life in October 2007. Ramsey is the cutest dog you will ever meet and the only dog that I know that NEVER lays down to rest. She definitely has been a great addition to our life and household.

The Beginning

Glen and I were set up on a blind date by a mutual friend. Our first date was at the Velvet Dog Martini Bar. We both brought friends as our "safety nets" I guess you could say. We had so much in common we both couldn't believe it. Glen asked me that night if I would like to go out with him the following night. Being too nice to say "no" I said "sure." So the following day, I decided that I really didn't want to have a second date. When Glen called, I told him I had unexpectedly had friends in from out of town and that I couldn't go out. That was that. I didn't talk to Glen again for several weeks. A few weeks later I took a trip to San Diego, CA with some of my girl friends and while sitting on the beach I had an epiphany. My girl friends said, at least give him a second try, you never know. So, when I got back from San Diego I called Glen and asked him to a Twins vs. Royals baseball game. I remembered he said he loved the Twins. He said yes to the game. Pretty much, the rest is history. After that second date, we were together all of the time. Glen moved in with me the following summer and a month later we were engaged! After a year of wedding planning we finally got married. It was the best day of our lives.